Show Love Fearlessly

show-love-logoI have a friend who pursued this one woman endlessly until she agreed to go out with him. He took her to an expensive restaurant with delicious food and great wine.

He told her all about his life, his dreams and aspirations, and his hope of getting married and of being a Father some day. She listened, and gave her account of her situation, and how she was looking to marry and have children some day too.

At the end of the evening, she asked if she could see him again. He said he wasn’t looking for a relationship at that moment.

Why do people go to such lengths to seek out the object of their desires, only to reject them?

Everything about this woman scared my friend because she looked amazing. Her body was the kind of shape he likes to admire. Her grooming and attire were classic without looking like she had tried too hard to impress him. Her manicure was fresh, and her manners at their table were impeccable. He couldn’t fault her on anything.

This is what scared him the most. She was perfect.

Embracing the prospect of love is frightening at times. Often, it is like steering a small boat through ten foot high waves with only one oar to steer you on your path. The swell of the ocean can take you high, only to crash down again and leave you submerged or out of your depth. What can you do to overcome the fear of finding the love you crave, so you can show love fearlessly?

Just like the famous book said, feel the fear and do it anyway.

In that moment when you lock eyes with someone you are attracted to, sparks can really fly.

Your heart can flutter in your chest and your breathing become shallow and quicken.

A rosy flush to your cheeks is the only sign your opposite number has as a clue to your interest in them.

The rest is up to both of you.

See where it leads.

If you feel you love this person after dating for a while, or you feel that this person has the same values and qualities which you know to be true of yourself, take that leap into the ocean. Keep both hands on that one oar and row like your life depends on it.

Because your life does depend on the survival of the love you have for each other.

Shout it from the moment you acknowledge you love that person.

I love you.

Three little words with the biggest impact known to man. Or woman.

I love you.

If you’re not sure, say I think I love you. It’s open to discussion after that point.

If you never acknowledge your feelings you risk being miserable for the rest of the relationship. Often, the first person to admit their true feelings to the other has the most fear.

What if you were the first to say I love you, only to learn that the other person feels the same way but wasn’t sure about whether you felt the same way?

I love you.

Say it loudly. Say it often. Say it with fear in the back of your mind, and then get ready for the ocean to take you high on its swell. Ride the waves.

About Robin Wright-Thurnley

Robin is an Associate Coach at Phoenix Relationship Coaching where he guides men towards achieving their dreams of lasting love.



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